The recent absence of Mr Headstone from society has occasioned a number of remarks from his friends and acquaintances, all of whom are at a loss to explain his sudden and mysterious disappearance. The waiter of the coffee house where the pedagogue was last seen lounging with a newspaper in his lap was most particular in his remembrance of the gentleman on account of the reckoning having been settled with a silver half crown. What is more remarkable is the fact that the coin proved by the application of the serving man's teeth to be made of pewter.
On hearing of Mr Headstone's unaccounted disappearance, Mrs Raddle expressed herself of the opinion to any individual who cared to hear it (or, indeed, to any who did not) that tenants who fell behind in their financial obligations were inclined to vanish without trace, and that the phenomenon rather than being considered remarkable should be put down in the almanack as a common seasonal occurrence. Mr Snodgrass, being of a poetical frame of mind, surmised that Mr Headstone had perhaps fallen victim to an assault by the archer commonly known as Cupid, and, observing that the gentleman's disappearance had occurred prior to that very date in the calendar when the cherub's arrows fall the thickest, waited in anticipation of an announcement of forthcoming nuptials. Mr Bob Sawyer and Mr Benjamin Allen were both of the opinion that an accident had befallen Mr Headstone, rendering him insensible or worse; and these two worthy gentlemen derived much mutual instruction from their fervid speculation regarding the manner of the calamity and the most effective application of medical assistance it might require. Mr Guppy, of Kenge and Carboy's, having reviewed the full facts of the case, declined to hazard an opinion on the matter.
The true reason for Mr Headstone's absence, which we may suppose is of interest to the readers of this chronicle, will be revealed in our next communication.
Mr Charles Dickens
